my mom has MS...i was 12 when she first got sick. she was in the hospital for about 2 weeks before I came to her bedside with my own personal diagnosis of her condition…at the time I had this crazy notion of wanting to become a doctor when I got older, so I used to read all of my dads medical journals. during one of our nightly visits, I wiggled my way into her hospital bed and whispered in her ear “mommy…you have multiple sclerosis …one month later, a team of
Multiple Sclerosis (MS) is a chronic, often disabling disease that attacks the central nervous system (brain and spinal cord). Symptoms may be mild, such as numbness in the limbs, or severe, such as paralysis or loss of vision.
MS is thought to be an autoimmune disease. The body’s own defense system attacks myelin, the fatty substance that surrounds and protects the nerve fibers of the brain, optic nerves, and spinal cord (the central nervous system). The damaged myelin may form scar tissue (sclerosis). Often the nerve fiber is also damaged. When any part of the myelin sheath or nerve fiber is damaged or destroyed, nerve impulses traveling to and from the brain are distorted or interrupted. More about MS
for the longest I didn’t understand what this disease consisted of. In the beginning, my mom drug us all over the country to attend informational meetings and seminars that were supposed to “warn” us about how serious of a condition it is…but of course we didn’t listen. I just knew that she was sick and she wasn’t able do the things just used to, like cooking or cheering for us at track meets. Sometimes she would relapse and go back to the hospital for long periods of time…Even still, it took me a while to actually grasp what she was really going thru…the mood swings, forgetfulness, muscle weakness, temporary paralysis, mobility problems, her loss of vision, the tremors that shook her body like mini earthquakes, the dependency of prescription meds just to get her thru the night...the insurmountable pain that shoots thru her body on an everyday basis.
at 24, it’s still hard for me to understand…or better yet accept that my mother is sick and that I can’t do anything about it. It’s hard for me not to cry…or complain when I have to make very adult decisions with my brother and sister like, whether a hired nurse or nursing home would be a better “fit” for her. or if her life insurance and will are up to date…whew this shit is tough! life is i mean…the card that we’ve been dealt…everyone has fought their share of battles and won…but sometimes, we have to step aside and let God when the war.
